All that Twitters….

Can anybody out there help me with this Twitter thing? I’m an early adopter by habit and so was prepared to jump in and swim – just to see what happened. I loaded Tweetdeck for my Mac – and Twittelator to my iPhone. I have my Tweets update my Facebook status and find that rather efficient. And as you can see below, my week of Twitters updates to my blog every Monday. But I now have 376 followers and find that, every 24 hours, my in-box is liberally populated by “requests” from people who seem to want to follow me – and tell me all about what they can sell me:

1. coaching programmes that are going to help me to get thinner, richer, faster, better, happier or

2. internet marketing programmes that are going to tell me how to make money out of Twittering (presumably by following lots of other people and selling them programmes that show them how to make money by following lots of other people….. ouch, my head hurts) or

3. people who are in touch with the universe through their magic crystals, candles, rocks, poetry, body parts or pets and now..

4. people who want to offer their bodies for sex?

Yes – my latest “thread”of requests seems to be from young ladies of a very tender age, prepared to invite me along to one of their regular weekends of unbridled physical activity with coach parties of willing participants – and why are they all from Bristol? I suppose it’s only a matter of time before I am Twittered by a member of the Nigerian royal family who wants me to look after $20m for a weekend. I’m completely losing the plot with Twitter. Is there anybody there who thinks this is anything more than complete bollocks?