Letters from an imperfectionist: People/Organisations who piss me off

Here’s a starter list – can you add to it?

1. People who use mobile phones whilst they are driving – we should be allowed to shoot them on sight

2. Organisations who try to call me with “Unknown” or “No Caller ID” on my phone – can I make it absolutely clear that I will NEVER answer my phone to you?

3. People who park on double yellow lines or on the pavement outside the shops in Hale, Cheshire – who the hell do you think you are? You lazy sods! It makes me want to take a dump in your front garden…

4. All the customers who sit outside Picalinos (or, as I call it, Prickalinos) in Hale, Cheshire – you pretentious snobs – you think you look great and you just look paper thin

5. All the customers inside Picalinos who thought it was fun to insult my daughter when she worked there as a cocktail waitress, so that they could show off to their friends – we laughed at you every week, you ignorant idiots

6. People who jump up when the seat belt light goes out on a landed flight and cram the aisles with themselves and their bags, as if getting off the plane first were a life and death decision (but even worse – the people who unbuckle before the light goes out)

7. People who think that, because they own a Lamborghini, they can hurtle it at 70mph down the road at the end of ours, completely disregarding children, old folks, dogs being walked and others – what complete and utter morons some nouveau riche people can be

Rant over – thank you.

Happy to hear your comments and build a bigger list – come the revolution……..